The Journey of a
Written by: Kan See Mun
husband was diagnosed with a brain tumour in late 2008.
We did not have time to get a second opinion as his
condition was life-threatening and he had to be admitted
to the hospital days after where he had the
After 2-3 months in and out of Intensive Care Unit
(ICU), he returned home unconscious till today. Since
the day of operation, it has already been more than a
initial journey was very stressful and difficult for the
whole family. I almost had accidents while driving
on the highways as I was really tired out physically and
emotionally. I often overlooked my
responsibilities as a full-time worker, running to the
hospital in the morning and in the evenings, staying
overnight in the hospital whenever his situation seemed
critical, taking care of 3 teenager children, doing
household chores and monitoring the family’s financial
issues. It came to a stage that I was ill with
fever every day, feeling impatient and exhausted not
only physically, but also emotionally. I knew then that
my body system was breaking down.
decided to step down from my fulltime job, hire a maid
and explained to my children to adjust to a simpler
lifestyle. I have gotten a part-time job, so that
I would not only be able to have more time to care for
my husband and run errands for the family, there would
also be a source of income for the family.
caregiver, support system, awareness and available
resources have become significant in the care giving
journey. Care giving can be very tough and lonely.
I often cry in the middle of the night when everyone is
asleep. I do not know when my husband is going to
wake up. One day he may or decide to leave before
saying goodbye. I would do my best to provide for
him as long as he still continues to breathe, despite
his state of unconsciousness.
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